Monday, December 10, 2012

Nano 2012 Day Twenty-Nine


So he thought he would throw out a question. "Hey, what do you think of M?"
"M? He seems like a nice guy."
"Yeah... I wonder what makes him tick. I've talked to him in the room and I know a few of the things going on in his life but you know, he's hard to figure out."
"Why is that, Kusa? Do you have a crush on him? You know, I didn't think you swung that way but now that I think about it..."
"Very funny. I'm just curious what your take on him is. You've always been pretty perceptive."
"Right. Hmm. Well, he wants to be a novelist, that much is for sure. You might have noticed him asking me about the books I've written and the whole deal behind that so he can get his own stuff published."
"Right, and?"
"And I ended up giving him the contact details for my agent. I figure, why not. If it's bad it'll just get rejected and I can let him down easy afterwards."
"So what happened? He submitted?"
"Yeah he submitted and my agent loved it. I'm really happy for him. It might end up published in the New York Times."
"That's really good for him! So.. what did you think of what he wrote?"
"Me?"
"Yeah, I mean, you're a writer."
"Well, I haven't read it to be honest. Just my agent saw it."
"Really?"
"Yeah he had it for a bit and he had it locked away the next. Ready to show to his friends on the newspaper. Unfortunately it was too hard to get to me."
I've got you know, thought the mime. There is no way that Calliope would not have read that story, that her agent, her agent she had a five year relationship with with her own books, would not forward her a copy of the story she had specifically told him to keep an eye out for. But it wouldn’t be the sort of thing that would be passed onto an operative. It would be like him being forwarded Okram’s mail, it wouldn’t be seen as necessary.
He smiled a knowing smile at her. He shouldn't have, but he couldn't help it. "Well I'm going to keep enjoying your lovely party. You have a great time!"
"Thanks Kusa, you too."
He walked back to the food table and got himself a cocktail sandwich. He took a bit out of it, hmm, pickled onion, cucumber, slice of aged cheese. It was quite nice. The vinegar in the onion gave it a nice kick too. He tasted an after taste of hot english mustard after he swallowed it too, so there must have been just enough to produce that effect without actually tainting the sandwich. He was impressed.
He turned and looked back at Calliope, who was looking at him, hard. He waved. She didn't drop her expression but kept studying him. He hoped this didn't turn bad. He wondered how many others like him there were out there, playing roles for other people. He wondered how many of them were for rich shut ins who liked to talk in chat rooms over the internet but didn't like interacting with actual people in real life and had to send out their surrogate? Really from what he saw of most of these people, they probably wouldn't have minded if someone had turned up and just straight out said, "Hi, I'm Kusa's surrogate and he'll he watching through this camera here and listening through this microphone and telling me what to say to you people. So just treat me as if I'm him " and noone would bat an eyelid. Or would they? Maybe the presence of such a person would remind them of how close to the razor's edge of social acceptance they were already, and drive them away? Make them talk to the person differently in the chat room? He had heard of the mentality where, when someone or a group of people considered 'unpopular' found someone less popular or stranger than they were, in a fundamental way, they turned all their energy into bullying them, even  though they had experienced it all their lives. This was mostly in high school, of course, but with the stunted emotional growth of most of these computer jockies, he could see those sort of behaviours following them well into their 20s and possibly even their 30s. Though really he would hope that most people had that epiphany at around 28 that told them that everyone was a human being. He really hoped so, anyway. And thirty was normally when people had their lives figured out to a  degree so there was no real need to find worth by pushing others down any more. But there were always people who needed that sort of power, people who were normally in power already. Big people who needed to feel even bigger by kicking someone who was small even further down than they already were.

Calliope had been distracted from her glare by the little brunette who had engaged her in conversation again. This time she was making sure she had her full attention by standing even closer to her, forcing Calliope to bend down to talk to her properly. This also had the effect of closing off the circle around their conversation, making it a much more socially aggressive act to try and get the attention of one of them. She was a smart thinker, she had probably been doing it all her life. The midget the mime could be sure was "for real". He really wished he could be "for real" here. He wondered how his face paint would go with his current outfit. Probably not all that bad, though the blue might have clashed with the tshirt. The white gloves could've looked a little out of place as well. Oh well. Next party he went to would be for real.
--
Menelaus watched as Kusa talked to Calliope. They seemed to be talking about him. He wondered if that was just paranoia, surely it must be? And yet there was a point where Kusa had looked over directly at him and then the conversation had become heated. There was a couple of times that Calliope had glanced at him too, and not with the half flirting look she had been giving him during their conversation either. She had looked almost... scared? Why would she be scared of him? Scared of something Kusa was saying about him? What reason would Kusa have to be spreading rumours about him? This was getting stranger and stranger.. or maybe he was getting more and more paranoid for no reason and it was time for him to leave. Yes, that was probably it. He grabbed his jacket from the back of the chair he draped it on and put it on. He decided to down another dirty martini for luck, those things were really good. He grabbed the glass and threw the liquid down his throat. He could feel it radiate out to his muscles and his bones. It showed him how much adrenaline he had flowing at the moment. It really was time to leave. He grabbed a cocktail sandwich, waved a general goodbye to the room and once again marched towards the hallway that contained the lifts. As he pushed on the glass door, this time he felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned and saw Calliope. "Leaving so soon, M?"
"Um yeah. Tina wants me to go to her house." He lied
"Aw tell her you're having fun here"
"Nah I think I had better go. I want to go to her anyway."
"ahh..." she raised an eyebrow. Menelaus went red, even though he was lying. He still couldn't even think about ..that.. with Tina without getting flustered. She was ridiculous. He was suddenly even gladder he was leaving, even if it wasn't to go to Tina's. "I had a great night though" he said, "Did you?"
"Yeah my night has been great! It's only just started really." She looked at him pointedly as she said this.
"Sorry I'm leaving so early. I did have a good time. Well, goodbye, talk to you in the chat room, OK?"
He turned and went out through the door and hit the button for the lift. He could feel her gaze on his back as he waited. Hell, he could feel it on the ride down and going out to catch his taxi. He felt a very weird feeling in his chest. What on earth was he supposed to do? He knew one thing, he wasn't going to go to one of thse meet ups again. He was really excited about the New York Times possibility though, he really hoped he hadn't just messed that up. Hmm. Maybe he would have to go to another party, maybe the next one he would try and get Tina to come along with him, just to see these people were harmless. Although, now that he thought about it, maybe they weren't. Okram seemed like a friendly bear, armed with a tactical knife. Calliope seemed to have a mixture of predator and tragic heroine and Kusa just seemed... off. Something wasn't right. It was all perfect but at the same time he could see him snapping necks. Or at least he could see him acting out the motions. Now he thought about it, he could see him acting out the motions of a lot of things, the guy moved like a dancer. Now that was strange, did he get dance lessons as a kid? While he wondered about this he felt his mobile phone begin to ring. He pulled it out of his pocket expecting to see a call from Tina, instead it was from an unlisted number. How strange. He wondered if he should even answer it, and decided why not?

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